You get what you pay for! An introduction to the Angry POF blog

A well used axiom states, "The best things in life are free." Of course, there is also another well-known saying – "You get what you pay for." In discussing the free online dating service "Plenty Of Fish," you certainly get what you pay for.

The road to hell is paved with the best of intentions. The creation of a free online dating service was a good idea at some point in time. Granted, a growing number of features on POF are no longer free, and perhaps at some point, POF will be no different than all the other pay to play dating sites. But for now, POF remains free for at least some basic features.

Sometimes I wonder if POF is a front or some government data collection agency.  That first page full of information you should fill out should be a foreboding sign of things to come. POF asks for a lot of specific information – your height, weight, eye color, dating preferences, page, and so forth. But then the profiling becomes very intrusive.

 These days you were forced to endure a rather lengthy psychological profile. Are we looking for a date, or are we trying to obtain a security clearance? It . asks for your earnings. I'm amazed it doesn't ask for your W2 forms! There is actually a method to this madness. POF dictates whose profiles you see based upon their arbitrary criteria. Who are they to dictate to you whether you are a match to babygrl666? What, they don't think you'd make a cute couple because she's a "fashionista" and you are "blue collar"? Opposites attract! Maury Povich does an entire show on odd couples.

My favorite question is always "Which child were you?" . I am the youngest child of two dead parents. Gee, thanks POF for drudging up my miserable childhood and dead parents!  What will he ask next? Was I bullied as a kid? Did I smooch Suzy Q under the bleachers? Did I do chores around the house? This question should come with "Emo" costumes and black eyeshadow.

This next option sounds pretty mean -- "Would you date someone that has BBW or a few extra pounds selected as a body type?"  My first thought was Peter Griffin wearing a no fat chicks T-shirt ( for the record I do not discriminate, I like my women with a little meat on their bones).


Just for the record, I have seen similar remarks from
plus sized women at POF.

At some point, you actually get to describe yourself. POF Laves another condescending remark; "People will read both your profile  AND message when deciding if they should write back to you. If your profile is really lame it won't matter how good your message is." Thanks again, POF! Now, in addition to being paranoid about the FBI showing up at my door, I have to worry about having a "lame" profile.

 So what are the keys to creating a great profile? Damned if I know? POF offers suggestions:

If you want to be successful on POF, try this: 1. Talk about your hobbies.  2. Talk about your goals and aspirations 3. Talk about yourself and what makes you unique.  4. Describe your taste in music.

As you can imagine, there are a number of profiles which follow this description to a "T". Why describe your hobbies when you are going to do like the other 99.9% of POF'ers and post them in the interests section? Duh, could you describe what "baseball" and "video games" are? And a lotr of people cheat at this section. They either lie or type gibberish because they are not investing in the website. They just came to laugh at you like Nelson from the Simpsons. Ha-hah!

Recently, POF replaced the ambiguous "fish personality" section with a more mundane "describe yourself in a single word. I kind of miss that-- after all you'll have to endure all the fish puns in the headlines, as you'll see in horror. Instead you'll find that "describing yourself in one word" is akin to the Price is Right game "Hole in One... or Two." Assholes. many of the options are two words! It is a minor, semantic gripe. Since I'm a guy, I have seen plenty of women's profiles with "diva", "princess", "fashionista", and the most dreaded and overused pic of all, "hopeless romantic."

There is one great BIG issue that needs serious work at POF. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not anti-gay in any way. But there needs to be a separate designation for those who like to dress up in the attire of the opposite sex, or, to put it in the politically correct term, "Transgendered People." This would help avoid any necessary problems from getting your engine running only to discover that you were looking to test drive an automatic and instead grab a stick shift, if you catch my drift. I don't dislike gay people or transgendered people, I just prefer tacos to burritos. I'm not at POF to compare penis sizes!

While they're at it, can they fix the local search to exclude cities that require me to drive to a different time zone? If I live in Indianapolis, Cincinnati and Louisville are NOT local profiles.

 Be warned, you will soon see a number of ridiculous profiles. This is what my blog is about-- capping on the insanity that is "Plenty of Fish." More to come.